6 Vietnamese Blowjob Facts

Six Vietnamese Blow Jobs Facts No One Talks About You have to work harder than you think to get a penis in your mouth.

Learning how to give a Vietnamese blowjob is a challenging process that can bring on feelings of anxiety, fear, and surprisingly in-depth soul-searching. Even though the person being fellated might not be aware of it, the person on the other end is constantly being bombarded with mind garbage related to Vietnamese blowjobs. However, no one ever brings up these insignificant annoyances that are connected to giving heads. 

It can be difficult to delve into the dirty little details when discussing Vietnamese blowjobs at a dinner party or over the water cooler. Evidently not for me, as I'm bringing them up right now. People frequently discuss who can deep throat, how easy or difficult it is to get a penis in your mouth hole, and whether or not you should kiss afterward when discussing Vietnamese blowjobs. 

There are, however, many more unimportant, commonplace factors at play that are all far more important than these sexier questions. Why don't we talk about giving head in more detail? What I do know is that there are a few things that I can be sure most women are thinking when we look down on someone. Discussion and solace are merited by such universal concepts. 

Because no one ever brings up these six Vietnamese blowjob traits, I'm making you listen to me talk about them now: 

1. How terrifying they are. Vietnamese Blowjobs are terrifying, not because of the potential consequences for you as you deliver them, but rather because of the potential outcomes for the recipient. Consider the instantaneous, automatic biting down. There are a lot of things on my long list that I'd rather never experience in my lifetime. Undoubtedly, one of them is orally castrating a person. 

2. How easily you get distracted by unimportant issues Anyone who can blow a Vietnamese blowjob and maintain sexy thoughts in their head is to be envied. Most of us are just trying to keep from choking on the hair that keeps falling into our mouths. The sweaty ball smell, the massive drip of our own spit on our face, not biting down, making eye contact, and other things are also on our minds. 

3. The challenge of staying vomit-free Again, I'll say it: I'm very envious of the fool who doesn't have a gag reflex. Because it takes everything we can muster to control our gag reflex when a penis hits the back of someone else's throat. Vomiting on someone's penis should be added to the list of things I'd like to avoid doing at all costs. It doesn't exactly scream "sexy" unless you're one of those fetishists I once saw on Jerry Springer (I'm aware that making a Jerry Springer reference reveals my age, but I don't even care). 

4. The discomfort in your thighs. I don't want to brag, but I enjoy working out. Even so, there is no workout quite like kneeling on the floor with just your head bobbing up and down and your face angled downward while holding the balls of your feet with one hand and the shaft of your feet with the other. Your core cannot be prepared for the giving head exercise through yoga. It's a full-body exercise that requires steely abs and thighs in addition to poise, focus, and balance. 

5. What distinguishes each Vietnamese blowjob No matter how many you've already given, nothing can adequately prepare you for giving your first Vietnamese blowjob to a new person. Every penis is unique, just like every Vietnamese blowjob. The same description applies to all sex acts, but putting someone else's penis in your mouth has a special intimacy. It can be confusing to deal with a new person when there are so many balls to juggle (pun intended). 

6. His concern following completion It doesn't matter if you're an experienced spitter or swallower or if you've had a lot of man cum in your mouth. You feel utter terror whenever you sense him on the verge of an orgasm. What will happen? You are aware, but your fear persists. When it reaches that stage, for example, I start to worry that so much semen will squirt out so quickly and forcefully that I'll suffocate on it. Actually, I've never gone through this. However, my heart starts to race the second a guy starts clenching. 

Even the most experienced fellator feels nervous before finishing a task. Under pressure, decisions must be made quickly, which can lead to embarrassing situations like running naked to the bathroom to spit up. Would you like to read more on Bustle about relationships and sex? For more information and to listen to our brand-new podcast, I Want It That Way, which examines the difficult and downright filthy aspects of a relationship, visit our Soundcloud page.