Couples Who Talk About Sex Have Better Sex
It has been demonstrated that those who openly discuss their sexual experiences typically experience better sex. Communication is key to having excellent sex. Even while it seems straightforward, many couples find it difficult to convey their feelings without coming off as judgmental or humiliated. In fact, I used to prefer talking about sex with my "ladies" over my spouse. I used to be concerned about my partner's response. Whether they could manage it? Would it harm their feelings? Despite how legitimate these worries were, I soon realized that by keeping sex off the subject, I was doing both my partner and myself a great disservice. expressing my sexual needs wants, and wishes to improve my relationship and my sex. Couple Sex
So how does one engage in sexual conversation with their partner? I'm glad you asked because I've put together a list of my top suggestions for making sex talk as useful and unflinching as possible.
the single topic at a time to begin with
By giving your partner a long list of everything they did wrong all at once, you risk overwhelming them. It's preferable to focus on a single subject at a time. One bite at a time is, as they say, the greatest way to consume an elephant. Maintaining focus will help you stay on topic and make sure the current problem is addressed. It can be ineffective to do too much too quickly. If there is more to talk about, think about having this as a regular event.
Commendation first
The secret to discussing sex is to avoid criticism. If you do, the exchange will cease before it has a chance to actually start. Saying, "You never touch my body," makes your spouse think you're whining and will produce the opposite of what you want. Try saying something like, "Last weekend's kiss in the laundry room was sexy. It felt so nice, I want more of it! We all occasionally have self-doubt about our performance. Instead of saying, "I detest it when you touch me there," try saying, "It feels so fantastic when you touch me here." These insecurities will get worse if you are critical. Sharing your constructive wants with your partner starts a conversation that makes them responsive to what you have to offer.
Bring recommendations
The subject of sex can be delicate. Make a list of alternatives or suggestions that would improve sex to facilitate the dialogue as effectively as possible. Tell your spouse what makes you hot and how often you prefer to be intimate. You can also share ideas for foreplay, fantasies, things you enjoy about them, and things they do that make you feel sexy. It's also crucial to give your partner a chance to share their opinions. Since it takes two to tango, your partner likely has some recommendations of their own. As for you, be prepared to listen when you inquire about how you may improve as a lover.
Enjoy a Game
If discussing your preferences in bed is not something you naturally do, think about making the conversation into an activity. Many erotic card games are excellent for this. One, in particular, is the game Sex Talks, developed by Mickie Woods, a Black Sex Educator, and contains 69 questions that strengthen the bond and improve sexual chemistry. If you don't have a game readily available, you can also make your own. Make a list of generic inquiries, then take turns answering them with your partner. What turns you on can be one question to ask. Do you occasionally dream? How frequently do you want to have sex? Which position is your favorite? What do you never do while you're in bed?
Ultimately, it's crucial to keep in mind that "excellent lovers are developed, not born," so if you truly want the sexual relationship you seek, fostering open, free, and non-judgmental communication is the key.
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